[Trump, Mary L.] Too Much and Never Enough

Child abuse is, in some sense, a matter of “too much” or “not enough.” Donald’s mother became ill when he was two and a half, suddenly depriving him of his main source of comfort and human contact. His father, Fred, became his only available parent. But Fred firmly believed that dealing with young children was not his duty, and he kept to his twelve-hours-a-day, six-days-a-week job at Trump Management, as if his children could look after themselves. From the beginning, Fred’s self-interest skewed his priorities, and his care of his children reflected his own needs, not theirs. He could not empathize with Donald’s plight, so his son’s fears and longings went unsoothed. Love meant nothing to Fred; he expected obedience, that was all. Over time, Donald became afraid that asking for comfort and attention would provoke his father’s anger or indifference when Donald was most vulnerable.

That Fred would become the primary source of Donald’s solace when he was much more likely to be a source of fear or refection put Donald into an intolerable position: total dependence on a care-giver who also caused him terror. Donald suffered deprivations that would scar him for life.

- From Too Much and Never Enough